on weddings and swedish berries

It's been awhile since I went on my wedding rule rant (found here). And since then I've been to 3 weddings. For those keeping count, that makes 4 in 8 months. And I just RSVP "no" to one in August. Seriously. This is my life.

I don't really have too much to add to the rules that were previously discussed as all 3 weddings actually followed them very closely. They all had great food, open bar, and very satisfying guest gifts (tea strainer spoon, candy loot bags and cake balls). The speeches were short and sweet at all of them (although at wedding #2 there was errant speech by the mother-of-the-bride read by the aunt-of-the-bride that was not quite as touching as she probably had hoped for), flowers and decor were lovely and not-at-all over the top, and the only ceremony to symbolize their love for each other was the actual ceremony (yes, I'm talking to you mr. made up candle and/or sand ritual).

The groom in wedding #3 was Indian, which made for some fantastic music. I've decided that no matter what ethnicity the man I marry is, we will have definitely be having some of this music playing in the background during dinner and then for a few dances as well. I'm sure it will seem perfectly normal.

Unsurprisingly I didn't really meet any new men at the various weddings. That whole "weddings are a great place to meet singles" is truly a fallacy. Only once in the 17 thousand weddings that I've been to has that actually happened to me. He was cute. He was South African and he wore a kilt as the groom was Scottish. We are now facebook friends and I thoroughly enjoy all of his rugby and cricket updates. At wedding #1 I was the only single girl there. Actually I take that back, HG was there and she was on her own, but only because her husband works in Syria. Yep, you read that right, Syria. Because that's a safe place to be right now. So she was my quasi-date - I got the fish, she got the red meat, we split the dessert. You know the drill.

At wedding #3 I didn't drink enough to hit on any of the young men there (and I really mean young - we're talking mid twenties - tops). At wedding #2 I had kind of a funny moment, especially as it relates to this blog. And the post from June 7th of last year in particular (click here). As pictured above, there was a candy bar at this wedding, which included swedish berries. There was also a Swedish guy there. So I asked him "what do you call these tasty treats in your homeland?" His response? "Candy." Smart ass.

safety first pt. 3

So it's been awhile since I've discussed the obsession my workplace has with safety (for a quick refresher, see here and here), but the quarterly internal magazine just came out and there was an article in it that struck me. It was called "Exercise vs. Egress." Some of the highlights are below:

"A number of employees use the stairs to run up a flight or two rather than wait for the elevators. Why not, it saves time and allows you to get in a little exercise at the same time. But, the question is, "is it always safe?" In a building as old as this one, stairwells were built solely for egress (the act of exiting), which is why they are so narrow .... if an emergency were to occur there could be extreme congestion if the stairs are not being used for their true purpose ... The building has already experienced a number of near misses. The stairwells are

not monitored by building security, so one scenario to consider is that if while using the stairwell you were to trip or experience a medical emergency it is quite possible you would not be found for quite some time."

For reals. Apparently at my place of employment, safety trumps fitness. I'm obviously not the only one who chooses to flaunt this workplace health and safety guideline as I often run into people in the stairwell - which incidentally is easily wide enough to fit two people going in opposite direction - so I know that should I trip and hit my head, I would found promptly enough. But as a bonus, I did learn a new word = egress. I will now try to use it at least once a day from now on. Sentence for today: If my employer comes up with one more ridiculous safety guideline, I will have to egress through the nearest open window!

abuse of the ellipsis

So only AH was able to make it to watch the Bachelorette on Monday night and she started of the evening telling me a funny story. On the weekend she was up at her cabin and her cousin Marco was also there. I don’t know if I have mentioned that AH is Greek, but she is and it’s a fundamental part of the story. So at one point Marco was playing with her son (let’s call him “Mikey”) and he had a Bert doll (as in Bert & Ernie from Sesame Street). As he grew up in Greece, he doesn’t know who Bert is, so in his game, Bert was “Mitchell” from the village. When AH asked him what and who the hell he was talking about, he explained that this random doll, with the mono-brow, looked exactly like Dimitri (English name Mitchell) from the small village back in Greece.

Now you may wonder what this has to do with the Bachelorette. Well the connection is tenuous, but it exists. I opined that Ashley would send home mask-guy and Greek guy. But then she picked Constantine first. What? He didn’t say a word the whole episode. English or Greek. Just one of the many moves Ashley made that had us all scratching our heads and wondering what the eff is wrong with her. It also got us wondering what the English name is for Constantine. After some extensive research (i.e. googling “English name for Constantine) it seems the answer is Constantine. Boring.

Moving on. If you look back at my many posts, you will notice that I’m a big fan of the ellipsis. I probably over use it, but I enjoy that when used properly, it can convey something that goes unsaid. I “dated” a guy who used the ellipsis at the end of every sentence in an email and it drove me crazy. I felt like I had to read between the lines to understand what he was saying. At the time, I figured he was the king of double speak. But Bentley’s insistence that his callous departure didn’t have to be goodbye, it could be “dot dot dot” takes the ellipsis to a whole new level and so I crown him the new king of double speak – or in a less polite term – bull shit. That said, I did not feel bad for Ashley as she was crying and talking to herself in bed, as she did it to herself, by believing that he was there for the right reasons and deciding that she was in love with him, after talking to him a total of 4 times. So thank you Chris Harrison stepping in and talking some sense into poor little Ashley. She definitely needed it.

So I would say that JP is still my front runner. He seems like a perfectly lovely, totally crush-worthy guy.* The problem of course is that Ashley is quite boring and has not proven herself to be that smart, so I will be very disappointed if he ends up with her. Much like Chris from Ali’s season, I hope that they don’t end up together and that he goes off into the sunset, away from the spotlight, and doesn’t end up in some ridiculous fame-whoring relationship with an insecure idiot like Ashley.

Why do I watch this show again?

*It should be noted that HC’s new boyfriend (he of the conservative leanings) is also perfectly lovely and totally crush-worthy and his name also happens to be JP. But he has a full head of hair and speaks with a French accent, so we can definitely rule out that it’s the same person. Phewf.

where the streets have no name

Remember way back in June last year when I was so upset that the U2 concert was postponed? In the true spirit of never being satisfied, this June I'm upset because the concert is over! It was on Wednesday night, and my, how fabulous it was. Beautiful evening, beautiful music and a few great stories - this one about Bono hitchhiking is just so fantastic. Only in Canada would an Edmonton Oiler pick up a rock star on the side of the road.

I then spent the 3 hour drive back to Calgary listening to all the U2 songs on my ipod. The one below will I think always be my favourite:

I should also point out that while U2 is obviously a big-time band, they are also a sentimental favourite. My brother had both October and War before they were big and so the fact that I got to go to their concert 30 years later is one of those things that kind of throws me for a loop. But it also makes me thankful to be able to enjoy such fabulous things like good live music and singing at the top of my lungs on the open road.